I was chatting with a friend in a college cafeteria:
How ya doin’ Josh? How’s life? Scale of one to ten.
Hmm…I’d say ten.
Really? I ask people that question a lot and I think you’re the first person to say ten.
I mean, I can’t complain. I still have a dreams and goals I want to achieve. But hey, I’m here in Los Angeles, working toward my ambitions and—
Our conversation got cut off. It’s been about an hour and I’m back home. I haven’t exactly had time to process why I answered “ten” so quickly, but I’m going to do that now.
Do I have lower expectations for my life? Is that why I said ten? I’m not rich, sure, but would a rich person answer with ten?
Could my life be better? Sure. I could have a full-time job, that’d be nice. But I believe the big reason I’m content with my life right now is that I’m changing. Evolving. Growing as a person.
One of the most “eh” years of my life was 2014. I did quite a lot then. I published my novel, completed two short films, learned a ton, made enough money that I was able to move to California the next year. However, despite finishing a bunch of projects, I felt stagnant, like I wasn’t going anywhere.
Life is so different now. I’m surrounded by so many great people and artists, yet still have a strong, rock-solid community back East. I’m developing new habits. Like this one! I’m painting a clearer picture of who I want to be. Every day feels like an adventure. Sure, there are days when I think, “wow, I did nothing today,” but at least I’m not thinking, “welp, this is my life now.” If I waste a day, I know that’s not normal.
No adventure story begins with the protagonist going, “man life sucks. Everything sucks.” It begins with Luke Skywalker staring at the two moons over the horizon, content with his life but knowing there’s so much more. Besides, if I can’t be happy where I am, how will I be happy with where I’m going to be?
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.
I’m not where I want to be yet, but I’m fully loved by a God who accepts me just as I am. It already can’t get better than this. With my eyes set on the ultimate prize which is Christ Jesus, I’m ready to live…ugh, my best life possible. I hate that phrase. But it’s accurate. My best life is my happiest life, but my happiness is not dependent on circumstances that change like the wind. It is grounded in an all-knowing, all-loving God who sent His Son to die on the cross for my sins, so I could live eternally with Him.
If none of that made sense to you, sorry. I’m just typing my thoughts as they come. If you don’t already know the gospel, I’d love to share it with you. How it’s changed my life and made me the person I am today. Sorry if this sounds preachy. It can be a little awkward sometimes, saying my deepest beliefs out loud. But it’s worth it.
Okay, I have to get back to editing. Josh out.